10 Tips For Divorce For The Holidays

Divorced parents should communicate with diplomacy if the divorce occurs during holidays and special occasions. This means there must be mutual understanding, respect and tolerance on the part of married couples, plus there must be planning vacation trips, dinners, meetings and giving of gifts. Questions like this only complicate a divorce.

Here are 10 tips to make everyone enjoy special occasions despite the divorce:

Plan ahead

Develop a program of parenting before the holidays.

Avoid scheduling the children to dinner with their other parent for lunch and a turkey dinner followed by a couple of hours with the other parent. Instead, arrange to spend a day with Dad and take vacations together even years after the divorce.

If possible hire a parent coordinator, usually a child psychologist or divorce lawyer appointed by the court until a judge makes a different decision.

Keep your word

Always on time and let the children on time despite the divorce.

Stay in touch

If children are with you during the holidays, call them and make sure to send letters or emails. It is very important to maintain contact after divorce. Consider the possibility of holding a birthday party before or after the current date. Children love games and gifts at any time.

Let the kids stay in touch

If children spend the holidays with you, go talk to the other parent. Give children cards and e-mail from the other parent and reads messages to young children who can not read. If children are too young to call, help to make or receive calls and have a quiet moment to talk with the other parent.

Be sure to avoid planning an exciting activity like gift opening, while the children are scheduled to talk with your mom or dad.

Remember, children often have short attention spans, so do not blame the other party if the conversations are short, especially if the divorce was not as pleasant as possible.

Travel safe

Make travel arrangements with airlines for long distance travel. Airlines provide supervision of unaccompanied children for a nominal fee.

Giving gifts

Coordinate gift-giving with the other parent. Do not give your child a cell phone, if you know his father and gave him another phone. If your former spouse will not cooperate, go ahead with your own plans, but do not complain about him in front of your children.

Recognizes the right of children to enjoy

Let your child bring home gifts to your ex-spouse. Conversely, if your child brings home a new toy or a bicycle, let your child take him back home to their parent.

To each his own after divorce

Let the kids spend Mother's Day with her mother and Father's Day with his dad.

Create your own celebration

Do not insist on attending your child's birthday or graduation party if your former spouse is uneasy with you. Take a day for you.

Allow the child to love both parents after divorce

Help your child buy or make a gift and a card to the other parent if the child is too young to handle the tasks alone.